Antarctic Poetry

The Sleeping Bag
by Herbert Ponting in the South Polar Times

There seems to be a difference of opinion amongst us as to which is the correct way to use a sleeping bag. There may almost be said to be sides on the subject, hence the following:

On the outside grows the furside, on the inside grows the skinside,
So the furside is the outside, and the skinside is the inside.
As the furside is the outside, and the skinside is the inside,
One side likes the skinside inside, and the furside on the outside.
Others like the skinside outside, and the furside on the inside,
As the skinside is the hard side, and the furside is the soft side.
If you turn the skinside outside, thinking you will side with that side,
Then the soft side, furside's inside, which some argue is the wrong side.
If you turn the furside outside, as you say it grows on that side,
Then the hard side's next your own side, which for comfort's not the right side,
As the hard side is the cold side, and your skinside's not your warm side,
And two cold sides coming side by side, are not right sides, one side decides,
If you decide to side with this side, turn the outside furside inside;

Then the hard side, cold side, skinside, beyond all question's inside outside and it does not matter a particle what you do with the bally thing, someone' sure to tell you it's outside inside.